Father's Day

When Molly Kate was just 2 weeks old, we decided to venture out to the Zoo. A little overwhelming! I am ok with the baby stuff....I have never felt uncomfortable with MK, but the stuff going on with my own body made me very uneasy. Besides all the yucky stuff that comes in the weeks after delivery, I had a cracked tailbone, was hormonal, and of course, exhausted. I was blessed to have a baby that slept through the night almost from day 1. However, because she was not gaining weight the way the doctors would have liked, I had to wake her up to feed her. Wake a sleeping baby? Sounds crazy to me, but I went along with it. Anways-back to the Zoo.

We have season passes to all of the Zoos across the U.S. but only went as far as Asheboro for this trip. We went with my brother, mom and dad, in celebration of Father's Day. We had a great time, and picnic afterwards. As crazy as I've been told I was for taking my newborn out that early, especially to a zoo, it was great to get out of the house. I think the main reason I didn't experience and post-partum depression was because we kept busy. Also, when you have another child at home, you don't really have time to even think about depression! (At least I didn't). I didn't get a lot of time to lay around and bond with my baby like most first time moms do, but that's ok. I know it was all in God's plan for me to acquire a bonus daughter just a few weeks before my own was born. I wouldn't have it any other way!

Molly Kate's Birthday!

I was due to meet my sweet girl on June 3, but as most first pregnancies go, I was overdue. After having an unsuccessful attempt at stripping my membranes, and ankles as big as a cow, I was miserable. I went back to see my midwife on the 4th, and she stripped my membranes again. I came home and went on about life. On June 5th, we decided to grill out with our neighbors. I thought to myself..."Why not just take a shot of this Castor oil you've been holding on to? May as well try." Within an hour of taking it, I started having contractions. They came on quick and were immediately 3 minutes apart. I called my midwife after an hour. She told me to call her back when I could not talk through them anymore. We finished eating, cleaned up, and went for a family walk. Daniel took Aubrey in for a bath and I kept walking for another hour. At 11 pm, my contractions were getting stronger. I went inside and told Daniel it was time to start getting ready to go. I took a shower, called my parents to come on over, and began getting dressed. All of a sudden my contractions got a lot stronger. Daniel was in the shower and I told him to hurry up because things were moving quickly. He got PALE and started throwing up! All I could say was "Are you serious?! Pull yourself together!" I didn't have too much mercy on the poor guy. My parents arrived shortly after and Momma was crying. I thought to myself "Geez....what am I getting myself into? Momma is crying and husband is puking. What's next?" We hopped in the car and headed downtown.

When we got there, my midwife and nurse were waiting. I changed and got on the birthing ball. I was determined to have a drug free labor and delivery. By now it was 1 am. Daniel slept, since he had worked until 3 am the night before. Mom and I walked the halls, going back and forth to look at the babies in the nursery. I found that to be good motivation for me. That was until I saw "Big Emma". There was a newborn in the nursery named Emma, and her birth weight was 10 pounds. Since my midwife has predicted I was going to have a 10 pound baby, I saw Emma and FREAKED. She looked giant next to the other 6 and 7 pound babies.

At noon they decided to break my water. "This should really get things progressing" I was told. At 2 pm, I had not dilated any more and was stuck at 4 cm and my contractions had stopped completely. The next step was to start Pitocin. I had always heard horror stories about Pitocin but was still determined to push through it without meds. Things started getting a little more intense, but nothing that wasn't eased by my ipod playlist consisting of John Mayer, Colbie Callait, Edwina Hayes, Kadie Hodges, Sara Bareilles, Dave Matthews, Elevation Worship Band, and Jason Mraz. Momma massaged my head and back-the back labor was strong!

Around 10 pm, the Pitocin hit me like a brick wall. The pain was causing me to spin out of control. Looking back at it now, I think I was too tired to continue to focus. I had been in labor for 28 hours by this point. I was exhausted. I made the decision, while bawling my eyes out in disappointment at myself, to get the epidural. I was laying, numb from the waist down 20 minutes later. I finally was able to sleep a little. I kept saying I felt "weird" down there but we just kept waiting. Pam Sauls, my wonderful birth instructor and doula was working so hard to massage me. Daniel decided to take a shower, and my Dad and Brother went home to change and eat. When Molly Kate's O2 levels began to drop with each contraction, my midwife came in and said she was going to put in an internal monitor. When she checked me, she began laughing hysterically. "Get the tray-we are having a baby! She is crowning!" As I thought to myself "I TOLD yall something was going on down there!" My momma opened the bathroom door and told Daniel to hurry it up because it was baby time. He thought she was just kidding until she said "She's about to push!" Out came my husband, soaking wet, jeans and no shirt, in a panic. "Wait! Wait!!" I laugh as I sit here typing this. It was quite the scene.

Through all this confusion, we somehow got it together enough to all stop and pray. It is something very special when your medical team prays with you. I was so blessed to have a wonderful Christian midwife. 4 pushes and 30 minutes later, my angel was born. They took her to clean her up and weigh her, and when she heard her Daddy's voice, she immediately turned to him. It was over after that-he was smitten. Daniel was the first one to hold our sweet girl and I let him hold her and bond with her as long as he wanted. I pray that set up a special relationship for them that will last a lifetime.

Molly Kate Milsap
June 7, 2012, 12:27 am
7lbs 12 oz, 20.5 in long

The Past 2 1/2

My apologies for the blogging sabbatical. The end of my pregnancy got just a tiny bit hectic and as all you moms know, blogging was about the furthest thing from my mind once I brought my little pride and joy home. A lot, and I mean A LOT, has happened since I was 7 months pregnant. My next few posts will probably just be catching up to speed about life since April.

It's often said that God sometimes has to do drastic things to get our attention when we are not living right. He has to shake us to get us to pay attention. I have always found that to be true and have had my fair share of shakeable situations. In April, Aubrey's mother had a major medical emergency that was the start of Aubrey coming to live with us full time. It was a scary time for her Mother-one that I would not wish for any family to have to experience. I am happy to say that while she has had a difficult recovery, God saved her life from a situation that could have ended in death. For that I am very thankful because every child needs its mother. This experience has also give Daniel and I a "shaking" from God as well.

For reasons I may never understand, Daniel and I did not see Aubrey  did not have an overnight visit with Aubrey for 4 months prior to the accident. She did not even get to attend our wedding-something that will hurt in my heart for many years to come. All the work that I had done to establish a relationship with my step-daughter had become null and void. I am not here to point fingers or lay blame. The situation was out of control and it is what it is. It's in the past now. I have forgiven and moved on. When we received the call about her Mother's situation, Daniel immediately stepped up, as a Father should, and brought her to our home. This happened the same week that we were closing on our new home and moving.(And I was 7 months pregnant). Stress? What stress?

The next several weeks were spent moving in, cleaning, decorating, going to labor and delivery classes, work, hospital tours, dealing with family issues-or shall I say drama, and trying to re-establish trust in my relationship with Aubrey. We were not supposed to move the weekend we did. I wanted to take it slow, moving and decorating one room at a time.  I wanted to immediately create a comfortable and normal living environment for her however, so we moved everything in one weekend. Thank you Jesus for a wonderful Sunday School class and friends that came to our rescue and helped us!

Fast forward and it was baby time! I will do a seperate blog on my actual L&D experience. All in all though, it was wonderful, and as soon as I held Molly Kate, I was ready for baby #3. (I am blessed to see Aubrey as a member of our family just as I see my own child). I have always dreamed and longed for the day when I would be a wife and mommy. People ask, "What is your passion? Your dream job?" It is exactly what I am doing. It just all happened a little quickly. This time last year I was living up the good life with Daniel. We were free to come and go as we pleased. We had a lot of fun, probably a lot of the wrong kinds of fun then. God has used these past several months to grab our attention also. Life has certainly sped up, but slowed down equally as much. Two kids keeps me running all the time. I never imagined the amount of cooking, laundry, cleaning, and errand running would go along with a family of 4! But I love every single minute of it and wake up every day thanking my Savior for this life. I try to savor every moment because I know it could be gone in an instant.